Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder - Preoccupation With Appearance

Introduction To My Blog Series: Living Successfully With Borderline Personality Disorder & Histrionic Personality Disorder

I was 27 years old when I entered into the realization that there was something wrong with me and one of the original diagnosis was Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD.

I say something wrong with me because I was just not able to manage my life on my own and somehow knew there was something wrong with my mind.

Back then, not a lot was known about this horribly stigmatized disorder because BPD patients were considered impossible to treat or wrongly diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder.

Along with BPD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder (ADHD) and Dissociative Disorder Not Otherwise Specified (DDNOS) were also added to my diagnostic mix.

ADHD was quickly debunked and over the past two decades most professionals leaned towards my having PTSD or a Dissociative Disorder – but something about these disorders never seemed to fit.

Add menopause to the mix and the confusion became even more confusing.

Anxiety

Here are past blogs I’ve written about my struggles with anxiety and what felt like PTSD or DDNOS:

My Struggles With Alcoholism

2018

2019

2020

2025

Present Day

On February 9th, 2022, I had a thorough psychological assessment by a seasoned psychiatrist. At long last, at 52 years old, I was finally properly diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder.

This blog series called Owning and Unraveling Borderline Personality Disorder & Histrionic Personality Disorder is my way of processing and understanding these complex personality disorders and how they manifest, interfere with and enhance my life.

Perhaps, as it has been said to me from friends who have family members with Borderline Personality Disorder, I can help dispel misconceptions and stigmas associated with these mental illnesses.

And hopefully I can shed some light and more personal information on what living with Histrionic Personality Disorder is like as I review each symptom and diagnostic criteria and how they show up (past or present) in my life.

With hope,

Stephanie, 🩵🌻

DSM-5 Diagnostic Criteria For Histrionic Personality Disorder

According to Theravive :

DSM-5 Category: Personality Disorder

Diagnosis Criteria For: Histrionic Personality Disorder Symptoms:

Symptoms of Histrionic Personality Disorder include the following:

Shallow, changeable emotions
Assumed intimacy with others
Hypersensitivity to criticism
Manipulative behavior
Disproportionate emotional reactions
Sexually provocative behavior
A compulsive desire for attention
Preoccupation with appearance
Suggestible and easily influenced

Diagnosis Criteria For: Histrionic Personality Disorder:

In order to make a diagnosis of histrionic personality disorder, a psychological examination is necessary, along with a general evaluation of the patient’s behavior and overall appearance.

There is no set test to determine whether someone has histrionic personality disorder. Previously, a number of pointers were specified in an earlier edition of the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders in order to help clinicians make a diagnosis3).

At least five of the following traits needed to be recorded for a diagnosis to be indicated:

A compulsion to be the center of attention that results in discomfort if unmet
Inappropriate sexual, seductive or provocative behavior when interacting with others
Shallow, rapidly shifting emotions
The use of physical appearance to draw others’ attention
Dramatic, impressionistic speech that lacks detail
Exaggerated, theatrical emotional expression
Easily influenced by others or situations
Assumes relationships are more intimate than they are

Preoccupation With Appearance

I believe I am at the lower end of this HPD symptom continuum because I have not nor will ever have any sort of plastic surgery or Botox to “improve” my appearance or chase after my youth.

Why?

Two words: Shania Twian.

She does not even look like herself as a result of so much plastic surgery.

In the words of Jamie Lee Curtis – I am “Pro-Aging”!

I want to grow old radiating health, confidence and grace.

That said, looking back over my life a few moments stand out with my preoccupation with my appearance.

To this day, whenever I pass by a mirror I have to look at myself. I want to make sure I look okay – even if I’m in a horse barn and my hair is a mess – I want to make sure it looks like an okay mess.

I am very particular about my skin – acne. I have a daily routine to maintain healthy, shiny skin. I do not pay a fortune for it. Just an over-the-counter acne gel and recently some castor oil under my eyes.

I am obsessed with my eyebrows – every two weeks I have them waxed.

I do not wear a lot of makeup. I only wear it for work or special occasions.

I wear a bit of eyeshadow and mascara. I’ll conceal a pimple if I get one and love lip gloss!

I invest in my hair – it’s colour and style.

About 15 or so years ago I went blond with lowlights and highlights to blend the grey starting to populate more space throughout my natural dark brown hair colour. I’ve slowly transitioned back to my natural hair colour along with a new short, pixie style cut.

I whiten my teeth – a bit obsessive with it, really!

I enjoy a fresh sun tan – that glow from being out in the sun all day.

My eyesight is changing with age, I enjoy wearing glasses all the time now, instead of contact lenses.

I was very particular about having manicures and pedicures but not anymore because I spend so much time outdoors getting dirty with landscaping, gardening, swimming, kayaking or in a barn with horses, it’s not worth it.

I enjoy taking selfies and looking pretty in the photos, then posting these photos on Facebook as my new profile picture.

I am very particular with the way I dress at work – putting an outfit together. One memory stands out. I was maybe 18 years old and while working at The Royal Bank of Canada located in Halifax Shopping Centre, I decided I didn’t like my outfit and needed to change it. On my lunch break I went across the way to a store, bought a new outfit and went back to work feeling more comfortable.

As well, I like my outfits at work to be coordinated, clean, and lint-free. I get a bit preoccupied if I get a dirty spot on something.

Also, I dress my age meaning I do not try to maintain my youth by wearing clothes better worn by girls in their twenties.

Over the past two years, I slowly gained weight as a result of having to stop running (bad knees and hips), a new knee injury last summer and eating more sugar when I stopped drinking alcohol.

I felt deep body shame. Therefore, three months ago, I purchased a new-to-me elliptical that has brought exercise back into my life!

I am slowly starting to see results.

I’m trying to cut back on sugar, but this is a bit more challenging.

My preoccupation with my physical appearance also means I notice other women’s physical appearance.

Whatever part of my appearance I am particular about, I notice this in other women. It’s so automatic for me that I have to be careful not to stare.

I think I am comfortable with my level of preoccupation with my physical appearance.

I’m not obsessive to the point of dangerous diets, plastic surgery, Botox, and can’t leave the house without makeup, sorta gal.

I remember when I was a little girl being teased (can’t remember by who) that I was vain – and the lyrics of Carly Simon’s song, “You’re So Vain” was sung to me.

Vain means:

…having or showing an excessively high opinion of one’s appearance, abilities, or worth

I tend to swing towards having a “not enough” view on my physical appearance and cannot recall why, when I was a little girl, I was teased for being vain.

Today, as a women in her mid-fifties – I like how I maintain my physical appearance, but can still run errands on the weekend in sweatpants.

S, 🌻

Quick Links To The Blogs In This Series Living Successfully With BPD & HPD:

Borderline Personality Disorder

Forget Everything I’ve Said – I’ve Borderline Personality Disorder & Histrionic Personality Disorder

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Introduction to Symptoms & Causes

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder & Histrionic Personality Disorder – Rambling Through Confusion Towards Clarity

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Bits On Biosocial Theory & Learning To Ride Out Intense Emotions Rather Than Focusing On Why I Am Having Them

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Strong Opinions & Identity Crisis

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Not PTSD – It’s Emotions – Borderline Style

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Empathic Abilities & Intentional Interventions

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Overlapping Symptoms & What Type Of & How BPD Am I?

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – DBT’s Mindful Breathing & Participating With Awareness – Grounding Words

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder & Histrionic Personality Disorder – The Stigma & Social Pariah Of Personality Disorders

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Is This Effective & Willing Hands Half Smile & The Middle Path

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Starting EMDR – Creating New Pathways To Calm

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – The Pros and Cons of Medical THC & CBD

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder & HistrionicPersonality Disorder – Amber Heard VS Johnny Depp

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Gratitude For A Wild & Crazy Life

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Anxious – Ambivalent (Preoccupied) Attachment Style & Fear of Abandonment

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Behind My Mona Lisa Smile – What BPD Feels Like For Me

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – The Hulk Uses Dialectical Behaviour Therapy

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – DBT Skills Need Time & Everyday Practice To Become A Part Of Me

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Coping With The Inner Critic

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Unstable & Fragile Identities

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Highlights Of DBT’s Mindfulness & Distress Tolerance Skills

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Highlights Of DBT’s Emotional Regulation Skills

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – My Ability To Self-Validate Grows When I Live In Alignment With My Values

Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Highlights Of DBT’s Interpersonal Effectiveness Skills

Living With Borderline Personally Disorder – DBT – Skills Thermometer – A DBT Skills Anchor Chart

Histrionic Personality Disorder

Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Introduction & Symptoms & Diagnostic Criteria

Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Shallow, Changeable Emotions

Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Assumed Intimacy With Others

Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Hypersensitivity To Criticism

Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Manipulative Behaviour

Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Sexually Provocative Behaviour

Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – A Compulsive Desire For Attention

Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Preoccupation With Appearance

Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Suggestible & Easily Influenced

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