55 Rules For Love – Rule #45 – Do Not Be Afraid, Love Requires Surrender

Originally published: April 4th, 2021


According to Merriam-Webster, to surrender is “to give (oneself) over to something (such as an influence)”

There are times when I feel butterflies in my belly, an excitedness of love for my husband, Michael.

However, this is an anxious, excitedness; anxious resulting of a love so possible that is actually happening in the now.

But, I don’t give myself over to it – I resist it – because of its vulnerability.

I do not surrender to this love I feel, I resist it out of fear.

There is this fear of some sort of loss of control – that I will lose myself because love is constricting – smothering – it shrinks rather than expands.

Then there is the fear of not enough love to go around.

I will lose out on not getting my share of it.

Or, I give myself over to love, someone will have control me.

Someone will hurt me, betray me.

Break my heart, again.

However, there is this calming release when I surrender into love, because it actually starts with myself.

When I settle into self-love, truly feeling at home in my own skin, then love expands outwards and doesn’t feel so threatening, after all.



I read this quote and feel it belongs here.

To surrender into love is the opposite of chasing it.




Anaïs Nin Quote - And The Day Came....

Allowing love to happen is to be vulnerable.

To let the warmth of love wash over you like a waterfall, to soak it into every cell of your being.

I also believe surrendering into love deepens over time as we allow ourselves to blossom rather than stay tight in a bad.

To feel safe.

To lower the drawbridge.

To let love in.

To let love out.

S, 💙


December 26th, 2018 - Genova, Italy - Porta Soprana/Walls of Genoa - Joyful Stephanie
December 26th, 2018 – Genova, Italy – Porta Soprana/Walls of Genoa

Introduction Of My Blog Series On The “55 Rules For Love”

55 Rules For Love – Rule #1 – When It Arrives, Cherish It

55 Rules For Love – Rule #2 – Whatever You Accept, You Will Get

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 3 – Understand That Love Is A Mirror – It Will Show Us Who We Are If We Allow It To

55 Rules For Love – Rule #4 – Only We Can Make Ourselves Happy, It Is Not The Other Person’s Responsibility

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 5 – Don’t Say Words With The Intent To Hurt

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 6 – Accept And Forgive Easily

55 Rules For Love – Rule #7 – Don’t Be Scared To Disagree, It Is Healthy

55 Rules For Love – Rule #8 – Never Be Too Busy For Each Other

55 Rules For Love – Rule #9 – Do Not Punish

55 Rules For Love – Rule #10 – Accept Honest Criticism, It Is Good For Us

55 Rules For Love – Rule #11 – Admit When You Are Wrong, Quickly

55 Rules For Love – Rule #12 – Support Each Other When The Going Gets Tough

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 13 – Live In The Moment – Be Present

55 Rules For Love – Rule #14 – Leave The Past Where It Belongs

55 Rules For Love – Rule #15 – Leave Drama Out Of It

55 Rules For Love – Rule #16 – Don’t Try To Control

55 Rules For Love – Rule #17 – Allow A Small Amount of Jealousy

55 Rules For Love – Rule #18 – Don’t Use Comparisons

55 Rules For Love – Rule #19 – Celebrate Differences

55 Rules For Love – Rule #20 – Communicate Openly and Honestly

55 Rules For Love – Rule #21 – Listen Very Carefully

55 Rules For Love – Rule #22 – Don’t Judge

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 23 – Don’t Manipulate To Get Results

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 24 – Learn and Grow

55 Rules For Love – Rule #25 – Don’t Try To Change Each Other

55 Rules For Love – Rule #26 – Don’t Condemn Each Other’s Family and Friends

55 Rules For Love – Rule #27 – Lines, Flaws and Imperfections are Beautiful

55 Rules For Love – Rule #28 – Trust Your Instincts, But Don’t Be Paranoid

55 Rules For Love – Rule #29 – Don’t Compromise Your Morals And Values And Don’t Expect Them To Either

55 Rules For Love – Rule #30 – Instead of Power, Aim For Balance

55 Rules for Love – Rule #31 – Space Is Needed To Breathe And To Grow

55 Rules for Love – Rule #32 – Accept That You Are Both Unique – Never Compare

55 Rules For Love – Rule #33 – Have Fun, Laugh and Play – A Lot

55 Rules For Love – Rule #34 – Be Each Other’s Best Friend

55 Rules For Love – Rule #35 – Don’t Play Mind Games

55 Rules For Love – Rule #36 – Do Not Carelessly Throw Away Love

55 Rules For Love – Rule #37 – Don’t Waste Energy With Negative Thoughts

55 Rules For Love – Rule #38 – Compliment Often

55 Rules For Love – Rule #39 – Discover Each Other

55 Rules For Love – Rule #40 – Be Attentive And Understand What’s Not Said

55 Rules For Love – Rule #41 – Do At Least One Romantic And Thoughtful Thing Every Day

55 Rules For Love – Rule #42 – Take Picnics And Sleep Under The Stars

55 Rules For Love – Rule #43 – Don’t Just Speak About It, Show Love

55 Rules For Love – Rule #44 – Walk Together, Cook Together, Bathe Together, Read Together

55 Rules For Love – Rule #45 – Do Not Be Afraid, Love Requires Surrender

55 Rules For Love – Rule #46 – Be Loyal And Faithful

55 Rules For Love – Rule #47 – Trust

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 48 – Be Grateful

55 Rules For Love – Rule #49 – Fluidity Is Good, Accept Change

55 Rules For Love – Rule #50 – Don’t Sleep On A Fight

55 Rules For Love – Rule #51 – Don’t Cling To It, Know When To Let Go

55 Rules For Love – Rule #52 – Discover What Turns You Both On And Explore It

55 Rules For Love – Rule #52 – Make Love, But Also F*ck (Regularly)

55 Rules For Love – Rule #54 – Give And Receive Without Measure

55 Rules For Love – Rule #55 – Never Gamble With What You Can’t Afford To Lose



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