Introduction To My Blog Series: Living Successfully With Borderline Personality Disorder & Histrionic Personality Disorder
I was 27 years old when I entered into the realization that there was something wrong with me and one of the original diagnosis was Borderline Personality Disorder, BPD.
I say something wrong with me because I was just not able to manage my life on my own and somehow knew there was something wrong with my mind.
Back then, not a lot was known about this horribly stigmatized disorder because BPD patients were considered impossible to treat or wrongly diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder.
Along with BPD, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder (ADHD) and Dissociative Disorder Not Otherwise Specified (DDNOS) were also added to my diagnostic mix.
ADHD was quickly debunked and over the past two decades most professionals leaned towards my having PTSD or a Dissociative Disorder – but something about these disorders never seemed to fit.
Add menopause to the mix and the confusion became even more confusing.
Anxiety
Here are past blogs I’ve written about my struggles with anxiety and what felt like PTSD or DDNOS:
- Managing Anxiety -The Space of No Mind
- Managing Anxiety and the Mind of Choice
- Anxiety – The Antithesis of Personal Connection
- Anxiety & Cannabidiol (CBD) & Exercise
- Trauma, Flashbacks and Dissociative Disorders
- AM I: In a Panic Attack or Trauma Response or Dissociation or Menopause? How Do I Tell The Difference?
My Struggles With Alcoholism
- Mystic Order – Reiki Level IIIA – 21 Day Cleanse – A Miracle Has Happened
- Spiritual Discipline – My Alcohol Addiction – My Story Now
- Personal Development – Cutting the Ties That Bind – Saying Goodbye to Alcohol
- Is Too Much a Choice or Addiction?
- Personal Development – A Wild Woman’s Journey With Drinking and Hedonism While Walking the Spiritual Path
- Personal Development – A Wild Woman’s Slow Transformation Towards Her Best Self
- Reiki Principle For Today – I Will Not Worry
- OYNB – One Year No Beer – This Wild Woman’s Successful Journey of the 28 Day Challenge and Beyond!
- Personal Development – A Wild Woman Walking the Spiritual Path – A Wild Woman Redefined? Absolutely!
- Personal Development – Living Alcohol Free – Musings During Day 78
- Reiki Principle For Today – I Will Do My Work Honestly
- Personal Development – Living An Alcohol Free Life – Year One
- Another Layer
- 365 Days of Sobriety: My Journey and Triggers
- I’m No Longer Ashamed Of Being An Alcoholic
- A Bountiful Bevy Of Sagacious Skills
- A Life Of Sobriety Allows Me Deeper Connection With Family & Friends
- From Domes To Sunflowers – Dogs & Sobriety – While Becoming A Better Self
- The Man Who Reminds Me I Cannot Have Just One Drink
- This Joyful Alcoholic Has Lost Interest In Bar Hopping & Any Type Of Partying
- The Consequences Of Drinking And Driving
- My Favourite People To Be Around
- Proper Mental Health Diagnoses. Feeling Safe. Accepting I Am An Alcoholic.
- Overthinking & The Joys Of Living My Twenty-Four Hour AA Program
- Accepting I Am An Alcoholic
- From Anxiety To Sobriety: My Life Journey From 52 – 56
Present Day
On February 9th, 2022, I had a thorough psychological assessment by a seasoned psychiatrist. At long last, at 52 years old, I was finally properly diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and Histrionic Personality Disorder.
This blog series called Owning and Unraveling Borderline Personality Disorder & Histrionic Personality Disorder is my way of processing and understanding these complex personality disorders and how they manifest, interfere with and enhance my life.
Perhaps, as it has been said to me from friends who have family members with Borderline Personality Disorder, I can help dispel misconceptions and stigmas associated with these mental illnesses.
And hopefully I can shed some light and more personal information on what living with Histrionic Personality Disorder is like as I review each symptom and diagnostic criteria and how they show up (past or present) in my life.
With hope,
Stephanie, 🩵🌻
DSM-5 Diagnostic Criteria For Histrionic Personality Disorder
According to Theravive :
DSM-5 Category: Personality Disorder
Diagnosis Criteria For: Histrionic Personality Disorder Symptoms:
Symptoms of Histrionic Personality Disorder include the following:
- Shallow, changeable emotions
- Assumed intimacy with others
- Hypersensitivity to criticism
- Manipulative behavior
- Disproportionate emotional reactions
- Sexually provocative behavior
- A compulsive desire for attention
- Preoccupation with appearance
- Suggestible and easily influenced
Diagnosis Criteria For: Histrionic Personality Disorder:
In order to make a diagnosis of histrionic personality disorder, a psychological examination is necessary, along with a general evaluation of the patient’s behavior and overall appearance.
There is no set test to determine whether someone has histrionic personality disorder. Previously, a number of pointers were specified in an earlier edition of the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders in order to help clinicians make a diagnosis3).
At least five of the following traits needed to be recorded for a diagnosis to be indicated:
- A compulsion to be the center of attention that results in discomfort if unmet
- Inappropriate sexual, seductive or provocative behavior when interacting with others
- Shallow, rapidly shifting emotions
- The use of physical appearance to draw others’ attention
- Dramatic, impressionistic speech that lacks detail
- Exaggerated, theatrical emotional expression
- Easily influenced by others or situations
- Assumes relationships are more intimate than they are
Assumed Intimacy With Others
Histrionic Personality Disorder’s (HPD) Assumed Intimacy With Others sorta reminds me of Borderline Personality Disorder’s (BPD) Favourite Person, but it is very different.
BPD’s favourite person is someone I feel I cannot live without, typically putting this person on a pedestal and expecting them to always be available as a source of emotional support.
HPD’s assumed intimacy with others stems from a limited understanding/connection to myself and my own authenticity therefore I was quick to assume that casual friends become “besties” and a new romantic relationship is my immediate “soulmate.”
Acting As If
For me, it felt like “acting” was the only way to navigate a relationship with another person – be it casual or romantic, as all-or-nothing seemed to be my way in the world.
I did not understand people. I did not understand how friendships worked. I did not understand how romantic relationships worked. I did not understand myself.
I was an empty shell of a human wearing masks, “acting as if.”
Assumed intimacy with others is a bit challenging to explain as most of this behaviour was in my 20’s and 30’s then started to settle through my 40’s and into my 50’s.
Now in my mid-fifties, therapy has taught me a lot, mainly the different levels of friendships. This has been very helpful in the workplace.
I’ve been married for almost 10 years and we’ve settled successfully (with hard work on both our parts) into this.
My husband is my soul-mate. There is no acting when I say that.
Too Much For People
Based on my experience, usually, this HPD symptom of Assumed Intimacy With Others (and BPD‘s symptom of Favourite Person) is too much for the other person (if they have healthy boundaries), and they eventually pull away – or run away as fast as they can.
When this person pulls or runs away:
A BPD’er will feel abandoned.
A HPD’er will “act as if” from an internal story telling them how to respond, then playing out the emotions rather than feeling them.
If the person stays and maintains the relationship it can turn very toxic because they too have issues.
When the relationship is formed, then slowly deteriorates and ends; the HPD’er will shut the door very quickly, already looking for their next conquest while the other person is left baffled at the HPD’er while experiencing their own grief and isolation from the break-up.
I was a never look back kinda gal.
But, the past always comes back to haunt because those unprocessed emotions will eventually surface.
S, 🌻
Quick Links To The Blogs In This Series Living Successfully With BPD & HPD:
Borderline Personality Disorder
Forget Everything I’ve Said – I’ve Borderline Personality Disorder & Histrionic Personality Disorder
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Introduction to Symptoms & Causes
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Strong Opinions & Identity Crisis
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Not PTSD – It’s Emotions – Borderline Style
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Empathic Abilities & Intentional Interventions
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Overlapping Symptoms & What Type Of & How BPD Am I?
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Starting EMDR – Creating New Pathways To Calm
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – The Pros and Cons of Medical THC & CBD
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Gratitude For A Wild & Crazy Life
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Behind My Mona Lisa Smile – What BPD Feels Like For Me
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – The Hulk Uses Dialectical Behaviour Therapy
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Coping With The Inner Critic
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Unstable & Fragile Identities
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Highlights Of DBT’s Emotional Regulation Skills
Living With Borderline Personality Disorder – Highlights Of DBT’s Interpersonal Effectiveness Skills
Living With Borderline Personally Disorder – DBT – Skills Thermometer – A DBT Skills Anchor Chart
Histrionic Personality Disorder
Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Introduction & Symptoms & Diagnostic Criteria
Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Shallow, Changeable Emotions
Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Assumed Intimacy With Others
Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Hypersensitivity To Criticism
Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Manipulative Behaviour
Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Sexually Provocative Behaviour
Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – A Compulsive Desire For Attention
Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Preoccupation With Appearance
Living With Histrionic Personality Disorder – Suggestible & Easily Influenced
© Stephanie Wells – Joyful Stephanie – Living an Authentic Life – 2014-2026. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited.
I’ve got ASD and ADHD, I can relate to a degree.
I understand that as social situations are a challenge for both neurodivergent diagnoses. 🌻
It’s so hard to take a selfie with an excited dog!
..and with two dogs, watch out!
😂🐾😂
Sure is, while trying not to get a paw in the eye! 👁️ 😂😳🐾
Another great post, Stephanie! Thank you for sharing 🌻❤️🌻
Stephanie, you are very brave and honest to say this. Thank you so much for being so open about your journey. Your knowledge about HPD is very helpful, and I appreciate that you are willing to help other people understand these complicated conditions. You’re an inspiration
Thank you Munaeem. I hope, in some small way like the Starfish Story, to help another have clarity and a better understanding of what living with HPD is like. 🙏🏻💙