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This past year at work has been another exceptionally challenging one.

I was doing okay.

I was aware of the variety of cognitive distortions I experienced as a result of, triggered by the actions of others.

I coped with detaching, and observing.

Trying not to get involved.

Until it became too much.

I started to feel emotionally unsafe at work, due to so much gossip, backstabbing and overall discontent with coworkers.

My sympathetic nervous system went on high alert, sensing discord – bad energy, constantly scanning the environment looking for danger. Looking for truth and transparency so I could feel safe.

I wasn’t the only one who felt this way.

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Administration eventually brought in a Human Resource (HR) Consultant to interview staff to look for patterns and solutions because of the breakdown in teamwork.

After all was said and done, I walked away with a small piece of advice from the HR Consultant:

I’m not paid to like everyone. Just continue to be respectful to others.

If I don’t know what is going on and why, let it go. How much space am I going to give this, when I don’t know.

How important is it?

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Typically, I am an easy going, positive person who enjoys laughing and fun.

This side of me slowly died this year as a result of feeling unsafe.

At this time, I do not respect or trust my immediate coworkers.

I do not know who is authentically in my corner.

Therefore, I find myself at a turning point within the work place.

It is a way I’ve observed within other seasoned employees I respect – a sense of respectful detachment with the adults while continuing to connect/focus on the students.

To have a strong, quiet way.

While slowly undoing a core belief I carry – that I am somehow responsible for other people’s reactions, bad moods, good moods, etc.

This is my work in the work place.

S, 🙏🏻

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