This!

I’m not even sure how to start my thoughts on this rule.

There are so many cliche, formulated perspectives on this heavyweight topic – Love yourself as you are, accept your body as it is…

Washboard?

My take on this rule isn’t an easy one, as I want my body to be in better shape.

I started running this year to make it happen. I’m enjoying the benefits of greater fitness – along with a body that is starting to reflect this. However, when I look at my soft belly in the mirror, I look with eager anticipation of the day when running has turned its softness into a hard washboard. I’m not sure this is realistic, but oh well.

Softness, Lines, Flaws and Imperfections = Vulnerability

Recently, while hiking with my husband Michael, I reflected on how beauty is in the eye of the beholder. My thought was – what makes someone the most beautiful is their ability to be vulnerable.

Vulnerability softens.

It is when we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and our vulnerability is embraced by our life partner, that our critical eye on ourselves and perhaps on our partner, softens.

The lines, flaws and imperfections of the physical body become beautiful, because vulnerability is at their very root.

A soft belly, laugh lines, creaky knees, droopy chins, grey hair… all perfect because they are a part of the vulnerability of who we are.

What Makes Me – Me

Self-care of me, reflects the type of me I want to be. But, as I age, my body changes with it. Naturally developing lines, flaws and imperfections happen, even with the best of self-care. Acceptance of this isn’t always easy. But, age tends to lend a more accepting hand.

Unless I fight it.

I certainly do not want to be one of those women who desperately tries to hold on to their youth with plastic surgery, and dressing as if they’re still 30, in their 60’s. I will always have a youthful, playful heart – but I want to grow old gracefully – with class.

I can’t say I will always look at my soft belly, and sagging skin under my chin with love – but this is my body. Rejecting my body means I am rejecting myself. The harder I push for a perfect body because I reject it, only reflects my harsh, critical outlook on myself – and I will drive myself into the ground.

I want my self-care plan to be motivated by the joy of feeling healthy and fit!

I also don’t want to erase my vulnerabilities – parts of me that are lined, flawed and imperfect.

Because, there is no such thing as perfect.

My soft belly may never be a perfect washboard… it may be more like a fluffy, perfect couch cushion.

Hey, at 51 – I’ll take it!

ps….and a fluffy cushion is a lot more comfortable to cuddle than a hard washboard. hee hee!!

S, 💜

Originally published: October 6th, 2020

55 Rules For Love:

Study Of “The 55 Rules For Love”

55 Rules For Love – Rule #1 – When It Arrives, Cherish It

55 Rules For Love – Rule #2 – Whatever You Accept, You Will Get

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 3 – Understand That Love Is A Mirror – It Will Show Us Who We Are If We Allow It To

55 Rules For Love – Rule #4 – Only We Can Make Ourselves Happy, It Is Not The Other Person’s Responsibility

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 5 – Don’t Say Words With The Intent To Hurt

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 6 – Accept And Forgive Easily

55 Rules For Love – Rule #7 – Don’t Be Scared To Disagree, It Is Healthy

55 Rules For Love – Rule #8 – Never Be Too Busy For Each Other

55 Rules For Love – Rule #9 – Do Not Punish

55 Rules For Love – Rule #10 – Accept Honest Criticism, It Is Good For Us

55 Rules For Love – Rule #11 – Admit When You Are Wrong, Quickly

55 Rules For Love – Rule #12 – Support Each Other When The Going Gets Tough

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 13 – Live In The Moment – Be Present

55 Rules For Love – Rule #14 – Leave The Past Where It Belongs

55 Rules For Love – Rule #15 – Leave Drama Out Of It

55 Rules For Love – Rule #16 – Don’t Try To Control

55 Rules For Love – Rule #17 – Allow A Small Amount of Jealousy

55 Rules For Love – Rule #18 – Don’t Use Comparisons

55 Rules For Love – Rule #19 – Celebrate Differences

55 Rules For Love – Rule #20 – Communicate Openly and Honestly

55 Rules For Love – Rule #21 – Listen Very Carefully

55 Rules For Love – Rule #22 – Don’t Judge

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 23 – Don’t Manipulate To Get Results

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 24 – Learn and Grow

55 Rules For Love – Rule #25 – Don’t Try To Change Each Other

55 Rules For Love – Rule #26 – Don’t Condemn Each Other’s Family and Friends

55 Rules For Love – Rule #27 – Lines, Flaws and Imperfections are Beautiful

55 Rules For Love – Rule #28 – Trust Your Instincts, But Don’t Be Paranoid

55 Rules For Love – Rule #29 – Don’t Compromise Your Morals And Values And Don’t Expect Them To Either

55 Rules For Love – Rule #30 – Instead of Power, Aim For Balance

55 Rules for Love – Rule #31 – Space Is Needed To Breathe And To Grow

55 Rules for Love – Rule #32 – Accept That You Are Both Unique – Never Compare

55 Rules For Love – Rule #33 – Have Fun, Laugh and Play – A Lot

55 Rules For Love – Rule #34 – Be Each Other’s Best Friend

55 Rules For Love – Rule #35 – Don’t Play Mind Games

55 Rules For Love – Rule #36 – Do Not Carelessly Throw Away Love

55 Rules For Love – Rule #37 – Don’t Waste Energy With Negative Thoughts

55 Rules For Love – Rule #38 – Compliment Often

55 Rules For Love – Rule #39 – Discover Each Other

55 Rules For Love – Rule #40 – Be Attentive And Understand What’s Not Said

55 Rules For Love – Rule #41 – Do At Least One Romantic And Thoughtful Thing Every Day

55 Rules For Love – Rule #42 – Take Picnics And Sleep Under The Stars

55 Rules For Love – Rule #43 – Don’t Just Speak About It, Show Love

55 Rules For Love – Rule #44 – Walk Together, Cook Together, Bathe Together, Read Together

55 Rules For Love – Rule #45 – Do Not Be Afraid, Love Requires Surrender

55 Rules For Love – Rule #46 – Be Loyal And Faithful

55 Rules For Love – Rule #47 – Trust

55 Rules For Love – Rule # 48 – Be Grateful

55 Rules For Love – Rule #49 – Fluidity Is Good, Accept Change

55 Rules For Love – Rule #50 – Don’t Sleep On A Fight

55 Rules For Love – Rule #51 – Don’t Cling To It, Know When To Let Go

55 Rules For Love – Rule #52 – Discover What Turns You Both On And Explore It

55 Rules For Love – Rule #52 – Make Love, But Also F*ck (Regularly)

55 Rules For Love – Rule #54 – Give And Receive Without Measure

55 Rules For Love – Rule #55 – Never Gamble With What You Can’t Afford To Lose